look no pants
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
