it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
