Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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