Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize