New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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