he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Dicks are not precious.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
