My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
My balls are so social today.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
