just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
