Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just cut my nipple shaving
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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