I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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