I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize