My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize