I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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