ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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