Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
