remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
i think i just lost a toe
Oh god it's open bar.
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