That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
