i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize