Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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