If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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