I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
