Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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