I like my sex mixed with concussions.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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