At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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