Small penises have feelings too.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
