I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Randomize
