eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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