My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
