I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
