Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
he was CRYING into my vagina
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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