Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
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It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
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So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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