Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Be still, my beating vagina.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize