420 ftw
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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