And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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