the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
