After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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