I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
