Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
