Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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