Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize