We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
