Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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