If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize