We're like a lot better than the average bears
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
