But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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