Having a random hookup so left but love u
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
