thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
