He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
