kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
