Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
