So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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